On Pandering, Part 3

The following are the nerdiest jokes I can think of, sent as a thank-you to all the hyper-intelligent, hypo-social readers who have made me the go-to man for that one joke to lighten the mood of your PowerPoint presentations on stellar phenomena.


"How many quarterbacks does it take to read a spectrograph? Well, that assumes that a quarterback could read, doesn't it?"

I heard about writing the letters of the alphabet when you're going down on a girl but I thought that might be too obvious. I almost got away with it, too. I got through 'UP UP DOWN DOWN LEFT RIGHT LEFT RIGHT' before she slapped me.

HINT: Do not confuse 'SELECT' for 'START' or you may END GAME.

Also, if she's got both A and B buttons, someone's using cheat codes.

A couple of my friends were discussing how to run an over-under fantasy baseball league over dinner the other night and one suggested the use of a 20-sided die.

… That last one is actually true.