On Unemployment

Reasons Why I Love Being Unemployed:

• I go to sleep when I feel like it and wake up when I'm no longer tired. This morning I went to bed listening to high schoolers catch the morning bus and I woke up to the sound of an elementary school bus dropping off their little brothers.
• Since my last winter job was eBaying my old collectibles, I might not have to pay federal income tax this year.
• I haven't missed a television show I've wanted to see in four months.
  
• Having been published and having made ≥$0.01 doing so, I can technically call myself a professional writer, so, y'know, literature groupies.
• I calculate my monthly cost of living at about $100, so taking my cue from Seth Rogan's character in Knocked Up, I should be able to live like this at least until the year 2012.
• I retain an uncrushed soul while everyone I know is working like dogs to pay off their debt and weed habits.
• I'm actually putting my life together? I know. Weird.
• I have time to write such wonderful lists